Being a grown-up 101

One of the craziest things I ever did was move to the other side of the country.

I should preface this by saying that I'm not talking about going to college. Honestly, looking back, going to college in Iowa when I'd grown up in Michigan seemed like a big deal at the time, but during most of that time I had a car, and coming home when I needed to, while inconvenient, was at least possible. When I was 23, though, I moved from Michigan, where I'd been living with my parents, to attend grad school in Seattle. I had been working as a hostess in a riverfront restaurant, and, although I had found roommates and an apartment in Washington, I was still not sure how the move-in process would work. In college, I had lived in dormitories, and this was the first time I would have to go through the process of buying furniture, paying bills, and making a new life.

I was offered a house-sitting opportunity by a Seattle couple who would be out of the country for the two weeks before my lease began. My duties were simple: water the lawn so the plants weren't killed in the heat-wave, keep the house looking lived-in so no one broke in, make sure the cats didn't die. I arrived in Seattle with a backpack, a small rolling suitcase, and my grandfather's sixty-year-old suitcase, held together with duct tape.

Two days later, sitting in the neighborhood Starbucks, I panicked. What the hell did I think I was doing? I knew nothing about Seattle, apart from what I'd seen on Frasier and the two or three episodes of Grey's Anatomy my college roommates had forced me to watch. I had no friends and no roots. In those first few months in Seattle, although I made a few friends, I also managed to watch every single episode of South Park on Netflix, and re-read Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles series. I was, to be blunt, kind of lame. In the end, though, through the arduous process of putting myself out there and getting hurt a few times, I made a couple of real friends, people who were there for me even when I wasn't entertaining or "on," when I felt completely disconnected from my previous life and wanted nothing more than to go back to Michigan and live a conventional life, one where I knew what was expected of me and wouldn't have to take risks.

A year and a half later, I'm about to do the same thing again. Less than five months from today, I will pack up my things and drive back across the country, back to the Midwest, to try and make a life and a career in a different city. This, time, Chicago will be my new adventure, and it will be even bigger and louder and more ridiculous than the adventure I've been having in Seattle for the past 18 months.

The truth is, since arriving in Seattle, I've had to do a lot of growing up. Like Allie Brosh of Hyperbole and a Half, I have had to learn to Buy Groceries, Clean All The Things, and Go To The Motherf*cking Bank Like An Adult (apparently, Not Abusing Capslock is a skill I have yet to master). Sometimes, I cook dinner for myself like a Real Grown-Up, while both on a budget and in a hurry, which I'm sure my mother and several of my relatives would never believe unless they witnessed it in person. A year and a half into this adventure, I bake cookies and knit things to sell to other people and pay my rent and cable and electric bills on time, holy crap!

There are, however, parts of being a grown-up that I Do. Not. Like. I am referring in particular to the times when I get sick. I have, in the past, made fun of both my father and my male friends for being Typical Men in the way that they try to maintain the image of being tough and stoic at all times--unless they get a cold, in which case, they become overgrown whiny babies. Well, men in my life, consider this my formal apology, because when I am sick, I am the world's biggest sissy. The second my sinuses begin to hurt, when my throat begins to feel like sandpaper and I experience extreme hot and cold sensations at the same time (which is horrible and confusing, by the way), I regress to infancy. My mother can attest to this: if she had been given a dollar every time I phoned her up and began the conversation with, "Mom, I think I'm dying," we would probably be able to make a significant dent in my grad school loans. In the haze of feverish delirium I have, on multiple occasions, asked her to fly out to Seattle to take care of me when I have a cold. So, gentlemen friends and loved ones, I apologize wholeheartedly for mocking you for your infantile attitudes toward bodily limitations; as it turns out, I'm as pitiful as you.

However! I'm getting better at this. After experiencing several nasty respiratory infections, a sinus infection, and, yes, the Swine Flu (no, seriously, it threw a major wrench in my watching-the-FIFA-World-Cup plans last summer), I have learned a thing or two about shutting up and dealing with being sick like an adult for a change. In the spirit of the dissemination of wisdom, as well as the attempt to deplete the world's population of whiny crybabies, here are a few suggestions on being a grown-up when you have a cold:

1. First of all, medication. Nyquil and Dayquil are sold together now. Thank. Goodness.
2. Don't feel bad about saying no when people ask you to do things. If you're not feeling well, sleep is, in fact, much more important than half-priced nachos and local microbrews. The beer will be there in a week when you re-enter the world of the living.
3. If you're feeling dried out because of excessive nose-blowing or having to breathe through your mouth when you sleep because your sinuses are clogged, steam, either by standing with your face over a pot of boiling water or by turning the shower nozzle as hot as it can go, letting it run, and sitting in the bathroom.
4. If you need to sleep and your current situation (not driving or at work) allows it, sleep, even if it is four in the afternoon.
5. Provided that you are neither dying nor horribly contagious, go to work/school/whatever. Cold medication should take the edge off, and when you're living in the Grown-Up World with a job, family, and responsibilities, you'll have to suck it up and do what needs to be done.
6. Coffee is sometimes necessary, but it's not a good idea to down four or five shots of espresso in one sitting, especially since your body is less-equipped to process it. Small amounts of caffeine consumed frequently throughout the day will be more effective in keeping you awake, so stick to a normal-sized latte or a small cup of coffee. Learn from my mistakes: too much caffeine will screw with your sense of reality.
7. Tea can be medicinal! Ginger tea will settle your stomach, rose tea is a mild digestive (as well as a mild antidepressant!), and decaffeinated lemon tea with honey helps a scratchy/sore throat. Yogi Tea, which is sold in most grocery and health-food stores, also sells a "Cold Season Sampler" which contains four different teas that are helpful in times of irritating and poorly-timed illness.

I can't believe I've just written half a blog entry about cold remedies. I'm sure that there will be more entertaining things to talk about in the future, this was just on my mind since I've had a cold the past few days. If you've made it this far and you find this advice useful, then you're welcome. If you're bored to tears, ignore it and hope I get more interesting soon, although your lack of interest is not really my problem, blogging being a somewhat self-indulgent endeavor to begin with, &c., &c.

Introduction; or, A Whole Lot of BS

I started this blog ages ago, in hopes of giving myself a space to write about books, where I could recommend things to friends and strangers and receive recommendations in return. Then, life got in the way. How inconvenient.

But even though I haven't got much time these days to read, or to knit, or to have a life, I find myself still in need of an outlet for the thousands of thoughts running through my head at any given moment. To that end, I guess How Inconvenient! will now fall more under the heading of "Lifestyle Blog," although I've got no idea what kind of lifestyle that is. Maybe, by writing about it, I'll be able to figure that out, or, even better, I'll stop caring what it's called and just start living.


So, introductions. I am BS, a displaced Midwesterner currently living in the Pacific Northwest, but in a few months, I will be returning to the Midwest. Professionally, I am a grad student and a musician. Since starting college, I have worked several odd jobs (including librarian, waitstaff, barista, arts administrative assistant, museum clerk, and--the rumors are true--lingerie salesperson), and, after finishing my Masters degree, I'm sure I will work some odder ones. I enjoy science fiction and Major League Baseball and living in cities. I want to adopt a kitten. I have strong political opinions, and those tend to be liberal (I've even been told I'm "radical," which I'll address later). Every year I say I'm going to celebrate Pi Day, and every day, I forget until the 13th of March.

I will be 25 next month. I think that what I'm having right now is called a quarter-life crisis.

There's your list of random personal facts. If you're trying to figure me out, those facts probably won't help much. Sorry.